OPENNESS IN RELATIONSHIP

People who need inspiration in life, expect to know the truth, and people who deserve motivation in life needs the same. Nothing can be as bonding in a relationship as truth. Lie breaks relationship, leading to heart ache and pain.

It is important to know and to find out how one’s spouse think, what his/her motivations are, life goals and inspirations are? Knowing the nature of your spouse you can automatically switch into that mode when difficult or distressing time comes. BUT it is shocking, emotionally disturbing to find out that the other person is secretive, and might be a compulsive liar.

Time and again we all do need a break, a distance, a space where we can be in touch to our inner self, keeping things to ourselves sometimes to work them out, or perhaps we do not want to hurt our partners feelings and emotions. But that doesn’t mean that one turn into a person where no one can reach him/her. Hiding things, being secretive or lying every now and then.

The basis on a true, loving and long lasting relationship is in openness, truth, sharing one’s thoughts and ideas. Sometimes what is right and true for us is not the same for another person. You need to find out the underlying cause of things, without being judgmental, without passing remarks. And the key to every relations is communication (that’s what I believe in).

It would indeed be difficult to trust a person who misused it earlier. But never break a relationship on it, rather try to develop a healthy bonding with the partner. Give the person enough love, so that he/she can open up to you, share his/her fears, tell the things that went wrong.

Openness helps build a sound relationship, where you set plans for future, share ideas, your private thoughts, knowing that you will not be judged or criticized, rather will be heard. Fulfilling each others emotional need which is boosted by honesty, love, openness which in turn are the core for a good relationship.

Relationships are very important part of our lives, do take care before you hurt someone by your lying habit.

BELIEVE IN YOURSELF

HAVE FAITH IN YOURSELF, IN YOUR ABILITIES, KNOW THAT ONLY YOU CAN DO IT FOR YOURSELF.

BELIEVE IN YOURSELF.

Believe in your abilities, that you are worthy enough for anything, and that you can achieve things with your hard work, persuasion, and sincerity. the people who do not believe in them selves give way to negative thoughts, leading to negative actions and self doubt.

Never let negative thought make home in your mind, as it will breed contempt, hatred, self defeating thoughts, demotivating you and will generate a feelings of unworthiness.

Build your confidence, give space for positive thoughts. know that only you can help yourself, no matter what people around you do to support you, the ultimate power lies in your hands. Take charge of your life. Lack of self confidence restricts you from obtaining or achieving goals, generate self hatred patters in behavior, thinking negatively about oneself, and stopping you from performing better. This is not restricted to self, it starts showing up in relationships, workplace, social groups, where you hesitate to ta take any decision, any step, starting new business, initiating a plan in office, sharing an idea, speaking your own mind, making you anxious and hopeless in situations as you think that you can not perform well and not worthy enough, or a more worse form of it like, what ever I do never turns out good or positive.

Setbacks do come in life, sometimes we have to face failures too, but that doesn’t mean that we are not good enough. This thing should be taken in a positive manner, that though I have failed this time, I will put in more efforts to improve the situation. It might take a little longer, but ultimately I will achieve my objectives.

Deal with your negative thought pattern, train your mind to think positively, believing in your efforts, your hard work, determination, know that you will do it.

Keep a check how you behave in certain situations, how you react to things and circumstances, know your behavior and your attitude toward things. This will enable you to see how you are reacting to things and dealing with situations, it will prepare you for challenging situations that arise, and then you will know how to handle those situations. You will learn from your mistakes, it will guide you which path to take to road to success.

TESTING TIMES

Life Is Full of Testing Times, Just Have Courage to Withstand.

A time comes in life when you are snowed with stress, hopelessness, depression, darkness, and it would not be wrong to say that we are shaken up to our core of being. these times are not predicted to some extent, and therefore we are not prepared for it mostly. This doesn’t mean that we cannot change our situation and keep on mellowing in it for a longer time, as it will be more harder for us to just give in and sit back to see how things pass us.

We should keep on reminding ourselves that setbacks, failures, disappointments, or tragedies are part of life, which make us stronger and wiser. The only thing that works better is HOPE.

“We must accept finite disappointment, but we must never lose infinite hope.”– Martin Luther King

In those times it, it would be a help if we have our coping mechanisms working, to deal with stress and shake up the settling of depression blanket from ourselves.

  • Acceptance of the situation makes the pain last for a shorter time.  Accept the things in the true manner. It will help you in coping with stress and bringing you out from the dark hole. It will prepare you to withstand the storm.
  • Gratitude will lead you a long way, so never let go it. Thanking for things even in the worst situations bring light in life, make the pain lighter and in turn relaxes you.
  • Choose your future wisely and start prioritizing your life, knowing what is more important and how to achieve it gives you a motive and a direction in life.
  • And lastly, believing. Believing that God is there to help you in the worst of situations, pray, and hope.

PUNISHMENT

•Punishment is an action that is imposed on a person for breaking a rule showing improper conduct.
•Punishment aims to control behavior through negative means. 
TYPES OF PUNISHMENT
•Punishment involving negative verbal reprimands and disapproval, this type of punishment is also known as negative discipline.
•Punishment involving severe physical or emotional pain, as in corporal punishment.
What these punishments do?
•Both forms of punishment focus on the misbehavior and may do little or nothing to help a child behave better in future.
•The children learn that the adult is superior and the use of force be it verbal, physical or emotional is acceptable, especially over younger or weaker persons.
•The child feels angry, resentful or fearful.
•It causes shame, guilt, anxiety, increased aggression, and lack of caring for others.
VERBAL PUNISHMENTS
  • Verbal punishment is a form of negative discipline.
  • Use of short commands.
  • Some teachers use negative discipline approaches instead of corporal punishment.
NEGATIVE STRATEGIES INCLUDE
•COMMANDS: “Sit down and be quiet” or “write 100 times”.
•FORBIDDING STATEMENTS: “Don’t do that”.
•EXPLOSIVE, ANGRY STATEMENTS:You are in more trouble than you know”.
•CRITICIZING STATEMENTS: “Is that the best you can do?”
•THREATENING STATEMENTS: “If you don’t stop talking, I’ll send you to the principal’s office”.
•BELITTLING STATEMENTS: “When will you ever learn to write well?”
EMOTIONAL PUNISHMENT:

Emotional punishment is meant to humiliate the child and cause psychological pain.

•Ridiculing in public.
•Name-calling.
•Yelling.
•Denying something.
•Threats.

Sarcasm.

CORPORAL PUNISHMENT:

Corporal punishment is more visible.

•Punishing a child by making him/her stand, in or outside the class.
•Hitting the child.
•Pinching or pulling.
•Kicking, pushing or shaking.
BELIEFS FOR CORPORAL PUNISHMENT:
•Is effective.
•Prevents children from getting into trouble.
•Teaches them right from wrong.
•Is different from, physical punishment.

The research show that corporal punishment does none of these and is in fact  form of violent abuse against children.

(Durrant, Joan E. “Corporal Punishment Prevalence, Predictors & Implications for child Development”. In: Hart, Stuart N (ed.). Eliminating  corporal punishment: The way Forward to Constructive child Discipline. Paris: UNSECO Publishing. 2005.).